Welcome Back

If you leave New York, you ain't goin' nowhere.

I stole that quote; from whom I have no idea. Nevertheless, I find it presently poignant now that I am back in the city that I prematurely left almost exactly a year ago. To say I didn't go anywhere would likely be hyperbolic. Professionally, sure, I was a waste in Denver. Emotionally and mentally, though, Denver was a wake up call, so it was good for me in that way. But, considering the momentum I had built in New York--graduating with high honors from NYU, interning at SNL, solidifying a group of amazing friends--when I left I left a lot behind.

Though, as city life would have it, coming back to New York proved to be just as--maybe even more so--fervent and opportunistic as it was when I left. Within two weeks of leaving Denver I was already back in the city interviewing for a job I subsequently got, expediting me into the northeast before I even had time to reflect. I had contented myself with being home for a while, enjoying the friends, family and freedom of Arkansas. But, as opportunity comes at you with a battering ram sometimes, I had no choice but to leap the chance to reclaim a life I was afraid I was losing.

Interestingly enough, being back isn't quite what I expected. When I left I was a student, a youngster, a 22 year old kid who thought that everything would just fall into place. I spent my last months of college writing papers at the last minute and drinking more alcohol in a week than I had in previous months. It was uncharacteristic but fun, and I don't want to give the impression I regret it. But, a year later, a year older, a year more mature or maybe just more aware, New York isn't NYU. We all have jobs that require 7 a.m. wake up calls. 9-5 is a schedule that doesn't exist here. Some of us are lucky to leave work by 7 p.m. Yes, kids, this is the real world. Of course we still go out and no doubt we are still young (the operative word here) adults. But when I found out I was coming back so soon I had to ready myself for a New York that wasn't familiar. I didn't come back to a dorm; I didn't come back to a class schedule and I certainly didn't come back with a healthy checking account balance. I was entering into a city where it was time for me to finally fend for myself, for better or worse. Whereas I used to return to New York apprehensive because I had just spent a winter or summer break at home having fun with friends only to be thrown back into school work, now I was distressed precisely because I no longer could identify with that life anymore. This was, is, new and unexplored territory.

Forgive me if I sound whiny. That is hardly my intention. I simply have to verbalize the whirlwindeness of this experience. Like anything and everything, it has sent me into a recess of reflection, so, alas, this blog. I am, most definitely, glad to be back here. Different is good; and I know I have so many amazing things in store for me being back here. Not only with my job, but with relationships and personal development. Like anything good for you, it takes a degree of adjustment, and that's exactly what I'm doing. Even though I wasn't keen on the idea of adjusting to a place I thought I was already mine, I am, without a doubt, adjusting.


Seth